My friends love to remind me of how ranty I get when the subject of women or feminism come up, however it is hardly my fault when there are so many triggers present around me.
The truth is that the way women are viewed frustrates me, just a while back a friend sent me a small entertaining video made by an admittedly talented bunch of Libyans This Video, what bothered me however was the message they were trying to send to their extensive audience. The video simply talked about the benefits of marrying a Libyan women compared to those of marrying a foreigner, or more specifically, a westerner!
First of all, may I just state that Libyan women are not worried about the dwindling number of Libyan bachelors choosing to marry non-Libyans, trust me, we do not hold some kind of pity party every time a Libyan marries outside the Libyan pool. Personally, I hope you did it out of actual affection rather than a desire for some residency card or passport, but never the less, as long as you don’t harm anyone with your actions and are a contributing member to society, we are perfectly content with our lives, single or married.
Second of all, if you want to create an ode to Libyan women, make it so without insulting women of other nationalities please.
Third of all, and most importantly so, after having analyzed different types of marriages occurring in our society, this is the best you can come up with. That Libyan women are better for marriage as they will get the kids to bed in time, cook endlessly for you, and clear your life of all types of discomfort, THAT’S IT? What upset me even most is the plethora of people seemingly agreeing with the content of the video. I understand the social roles of men and women in our country but times are changing, women are becoming job makers, entrepreneurs, artists, you name it. And at this point in our country, we cannot afford to spare any ideas. But when you present young girls with this picture of how they are meant to be and how they must act, instinctively it becomes their goal especially in occasions where that is the only example provided by the environment around her. When you tell a girl that she will grow up to be judged by her cooking skills, homemaking abilities, and marriage potential, it becomes all that occupies her mind especially when half the community encourages it.
This is something that I worry about endlessly, as the eldest I was exposed to more liberal societies growing up, I was influenced by it much more than family actually, which is why I worry for my sisters. How can my family’s influence override that of a whole society, one where they are repeatedly forced into and feel the need to fit in. This society is comprised of their friends, classmates, relatives close and far which do not necessarily put any importance on Women’s thoughts and achievements less they be in the kitchen, but place a majority of it on her role as a housewife, which as noble as it is, is not the whole picture.